Wednesday, February 27, 2013

My Brother

List of foods I'm gonna cook & bake for him was ready in my mind. Last time when I was there he liked the kheer/rice pudding I made, very much, so I made it every other day just for him. He always loved the cakes I made, but plan for this vacation was mainly baking breads, one of his favourite.

In the morning when we skyped I kinda gave him the warning that this is the last time I'm asking him what he want from here and he said "nothing". I asked him are you sure & he said yes, you can get everything here....You just come. It was after many years that I was planning to stay there for one full month as last few trips it's always been a short stay. In my mind I decided Pistachios is one of his fav. food so that's final I'm gonna take that for him. Who knew it was going to be literally last time. Middle of the night I got the call from my father and could not believe that our world is changed my brother was gone, gone forever.

I lost my brother/bhai back in the month of June 2012. It took less than a minute or so and he was gone, no sign of any illness. I'm sure God must be having his own reasons to take him away, which we can never understand. He was only in his early 40's not the time of the life when you think it can happen to you but it happened, my father had no choice but watch helplessly. I can only pray that no body ever have to face anything like that.

He was the kind of brother who would cook for me when our mom was out of town for some wedding. I use to be his sous chef, who would do prep work & he'll cook & later I'll do cleaning. Food was one big connection. Even my lil'one never forget to mention about him whenever she eats Smiles(potato snack), like Mamu(mom's brother) use to make for me. Time never was important for him,10:00 p.m he's back from his work & he would make noodles or smiles for the kids just because they asked for it & I refused to make it so late in the night.

He was always there whenever I needed anything, be it my visit to meet some friend at the other end of the city or my lil'one needed a diaper change and I was sleeping due to jet lag. Life is uncertain we all know, but never thought that much uncertain It's been more than 9 months but still every single second my mind keep thinking how it's possible that we not gonna meet each other again, ever. So many materialistic things in life are not important at all any more. Life's priorities are changed a little bit, in the morning when kids go to school now, I don't forget to say "I Luv U", even if I've been yelling at them that U r getting late but still a kiss before they leave for school with the words "Luv U" seems much more important.

Every single day since I came back from India, I've been thinking about writing this post but had no guts to write it but this is some thing I had to share before I can start blogging again. He'll always be in our heart and I can only pray that wherever he is, may God rest his soul in peace. Miss You Bhai.